"dati"

ang sakit isipain na halos itapn niya na ang lahat ng pinagsamahan niyo. na pakatapos ng maraming taon ng pagsasama sa lahat ng saya at problema ay bigla na lng magbabago ang lahat. ni hindi ka man lang nasabihan na "oh.hanggang dito na lang tayo ah" masakit kung manggagaling yun ng direkta sa kanya.pero mas masakit kung walang pasabi.gusto kong magalit.gusto kong mainis.pero wala akong magawa.hindi ko pa rin kaya. araw araw akong nasasaktan sa bawat nalalaman ko.sa mga naririnig ko.pero eto pa din ako.naghihintay.kunyari deadma lang.kunyari okay lang.pero gusto ko ng umiyak.kung kasama lang ng luha ang lahat ng sakit di sana okay na ako.pero ganun nga tlaga.hindi nito mababago ang katotohanang hanggang ngayon mahalaga pa siya sayo.na sobrang halaga ay handa kong kalimutan sa isang iglap ang lahat sabihin mo lang.isang ngiti mo lang handa kong simulan ang lahat at piliting mas maging masay ngayon.pro hindi eh.may balak pa ba siyang gawin yun?may balak pa ba siyang mangyari yun?ewan ko. isang malaking SANA ang gusto ko.gusto ko na siyang makita ulit kahit na mas nasasaktan ako.madami na akong gustong sabihin sa kanya pero eto ako nakatulala.gusto ko na siyang yakapin kahit hindi na ako magsalita pa.baka sakaling maparamdam ko sa kanya na mahalaga siya sa akin higit pa sa kaya niyang isipin.:(

i woke up this morning crying. i really do not know why until i finally realized what i dreamed of. sa panaginip ko bigla xang lumapit sa akin in a setting i really cannot remember. parang it was like a get together of people close to me. andun sina alex.si aila.dun lahat pwera xa. i was sad xmpre pero wala naman aqng magawa.tpos bigla xang dumating and kahit naaalangan na ako masay din aq kahit papano dhil nakita q xa. so weird dhil tahimik xa. bigla xang lumapit and started crying. she said "i'm sorry.." i was surprised to finally hear that from her. at the same time i was confused and i do not know what to say. sbi nia "pare.nag ka byfriend aq sa manila habang medyo hindi tayo magkaayos.then lately we broke up.." lalo akong nagulat at nalito.ang dami kong gusto itanong. gusto ko magalit sa taong iyon dahil alam ko nasasaktan tong taong ito na nasa harap ko.sabi ko "tapos?" sabi nia "sorry.kasi sobrang naging masaya ako sa kanya at nakalimutan na kita.kaya siguro i did not have enough initiative to patch things up between the two of us..sorry. i need you back pare" hindi ko mapigilan na umiyak nung marinig ko yun.lahat ng galiut.lahat ng sakit nawala.wala ng tampo.wla ng tanong2 pa.ang alam ko eto na xa.niyakap ko xa after.tpos sabi ko "don't worry.andito na ako pare.dai taka na pababayaan ulit.sorry.." tpos everything felt right . i was happy again.and i was willing to start all over again. masaya na sana.kaso nagising ako bigla.that was the time i realized it was all a dream.and wla pala xa sa tabi ko..:(

nand'yan ka na naman
tinutukso-tukso ang aking puso
ilang ulit na bang
iniiwasan ka di na natuto

sulyap ng 'yong mata
laging nadarama kahit malayo, ooh
nahihirapan na
lalapit-lapit pa di na natuto

isang ngiti mo lang
at ako'y napapaamo
yakapin mong minsan
ay muling magbabalik sa'yo

na walang kalaban-laban
ang puso ko'y tanging iyo lamang
ooh...

o eto na naman
laging nananabik ang aking puso,
ooh...
muling bumabalik
sa 'yong mga halik
di na natuto

isang ngiti mo lang
at ako'y napapaamo
yakapin mong minsan
ay muling magbabalik sa'yo

na walang kalaban-laban
ang puso ko'y tanging iyo lamang


lately hindi na kita naaalala.i was living my life normally pero xmpre alam kong may kulang.but then i wanted to try to become happy as long as i can.then i suddenly have this dream.namiss tka lalo:(

It feels like a lifetime,
A thousand days have passed by
Since I held you close to me
If I could see that smile from my friend
I know that I could live again
I need you here with me

Heaven knows what to say
Even though for right
Nw you’re so far away
I hope and I pray
Somewhere in your heart I’ll always stay

Girl, lately my sun doesn’t shine without you
Never noticed what it feels like to be without you
Feels like I took my last step
And my last breath in my life ending
Had to say just what I was feeling, girl
‘Cause my sun doesn’t shine,
Sun doesn’t shine without you

This is more for me than for you
Girl, I finally see there’s no substitute
For what we have
Do you know how much I love you

Heaven knows what to say
Even though for right now you’re so far away
Gonna tell you and show you
Do whatever I can do to get back to you

Girl, lately my sun doesn’t shine without you
Never noticed what it feels like to be without you
Feels like I took my last step
And my last breath in my life ending
Had to say just what I was feeling, girl
‘Cause my sun doesn’t shine,
Sun doesn’t shine without you

trixia i miss you so much.balik ka na pare.please :(

confused..again?!

hmm.matragal na dn ung last post ko dito ah.anyway it feels good to be bac kasi im here to tell these rthings which i could not say to any body or perhaps because the persons i intend to tell these are not here. hmm. i just don't know what to feel right now. today as i am posting in this blog. i should have been entering my socio class but then i have this feeling taht i won't be able to perform well today in class so i prefered to skip them. galing ng rason no?well.ganun tlga. hindi ko lang alam ang dapat maramdaman ngayon. ikaw ba naman paiawasan sa isang taong mahalaga sayo dahil lang sa iisipin ng iba. well. not a new story at all pero mas mahirap nga lang ngayon. ganito kasi. last week. nov. 20 to be exact. naging close ako bigla sa isang taong mataga q ng kilala pero never q xang nakausap nung high school. eh tapos etoo bigla kaming nagkausap.hmm/i know i know this does not sound good kaya nga parang im choosing over the idea of putting a distance between us before anything happens. nadiscover ko na all this time takot na akong makasakit poa ng tao.hmm. ayaw ko naman tlga yun but then its like i have this talent of doing that. mahirap nga eh kasi ok naman kami. i just don't know whta to do. i don't know whta would happen and what would be the ending of this. malay ko ba. hainaku